HOW YOU CAN HELP YOUR DAGGER CHILD
I described the characteristics of a dagger child in my previous post. You can read it here. Your dagger child is phenomenal, and they need your help as a parent or caregiver. If you don't teach and nurture them, they will grow overly dependent on others and refuse to explore and become all they were made to be. These are some of the ways you can help them:
1. Encourage autonomy: Provide more opportunities for your dagger child to make decisions and solve problems independently. Don't be quick to rescue them always, and teach them that they don't always have to be around others to enjoy life. Get them involved in diverse activities that will help them enjoy being with themselves and solving problems independently, like reading, using Legos to build, puzzles, word searches, mazes and others.
2. Expand their boundaries and Encourage them to take risks: Gently push them outside their comfort zones by encouraging them to take calculated risks and explore new experiences. Don't be harsh when they always want to do 'gum body', but gently and firmly let them know they can always try new things. Show them that risks are not death traps and new things are usually safe to try.
3. Teach resilience: Help them understand that setbacks and failures are part of the learning process and provide support in navigating and learning from those experiences. Your dagger child can be stuck when he makes mistakes and refuse to try again. Teach them that failure is only a learning curve, not a death or defeat sentence.
4. Teach them to appreciate aloneness: A dagger child can become stuck in unhealthy friendships when their friends threaten to leave them because they are not playing by their rules. Teach your child that it is sometimes okay to be alone and that not everyone will like or appreciate them. Make them always know they are loved and create a secure environment at home for them to thrive, unburden and unwind.
5. Let them know how to embrace rejection and deal with NOs: You have to mirror this to them. When they tell you NO, don't become livid. Be gracious and gently guide them to turn their No to Yes if it is a do-or-die affair so they can learn how to handle No. A dagger child sees a No as a rejection of their person. You must show them that Nos are part of life and that when a child says she will not play with them, it is just a matter of temporary choice, not a permanent rejection.
6. Help them develop healthy boundaries and principles: While a dagger child can pick up other people’s feelings easily, they can also overlook red flags easily, especially when the person is always around them and meets their need for connection. Such children can quickly see warning signs, but if they are not taught to walk away, they will stay until they get burnt. Help your child develop healthy boundaries by instilling courage in them. If you constantly yell at such children, they will lose their confidence, which might become fatal when they face situations that require strength and courage. Let them develop the right principles to help them filter what is unacceptable. As a Christian, I counsel parents to introduce their children to Jesus as early as possible so they can know Him and stand amid compromising situations.
CONCLUSION
You need to strike a balance between providing guidance and allowing the dagger child to develop their own independence and decision-making skills. Endeavour to create new and safe experiences for them to try and be gentle and firm with them. Your dagger child will blossom into a well-rounded person when you help them understand how special, loved and capable they are.
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In my next post, I will discuss the sword child.
Do have a splendid time nurturing your dagger child to greatness.
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